Author |
Topic |
Whippersnapper. "A fourword thinking guy."
|
Posted - 04/18/2007 : 11:55:15
|
Ladies and Gentlemen, [prolonged applause]
I know this is the moment you have all been waiting for. All of the votes have now been counted and recounted, and we can now reveal to you all the winners of our wonderful Haiku competition #53! [even more prolonged applause]
I have here the envelope with the results [sudden hush]
I will now open the envelope. [total silence. Someone drops a pin which reverberates around the auditorium. The culprit is forceably ejected and silence is once again restored. The envelope is opened and the card is removed.]
Ladies and Gentlemen, I can now reveal the results.
But before that, a short commercial break...
|
|
|
Whippersnapper. "A fourword thinking guy."
|
Posted - 04/18/2007 : 12:03:36
|
Ladies & Gentlemen
We have now returned from our commercial break and can now, finally, reveal the results of our 53rd Haiku Competition.
But first, a word of thanks to all our participants. Thanks!
And now, Ladies & Gentlemen, I can reveal that we have a tie for 2nd and third place... [Drum Roll...]
Both scoring ELEVEN points, both 3,3,2,2,1 we have...
[tension builds]
And I'm going to give these in alphabetical order...
[tension is unbearable]
The Brilliant BaftaBabe And the Magnificent Montgomery!
[Cheers, whistles, applause. One guy boos but he too is forceably ejected none too gently by our "security staff".]
And now, Ladies & Gentlemen, it only remains to reveal the winner of our contest.
But first, a short commercial break...
|
|
|
Whippersnapper. "A fourword thinking guy."
|
Posted - 04/18/2007 : 12:11:43
|
Ladies & Gentlemen
We are now back from our commercial break and into the final part of our show this evening.
There were seven entries for our Haiku competition, but who actually won?
[BIG drum roll]
With a score of 13 points, 3,3,3,2,1,1 I can now reveal...
That the winner of Haiku competition 53 is...
The one...
The only...
[tension is so unbearable members of the audience are beginning to faint]
WHIPPERSNAPPER!
[Pandemonium breaks out. Calls of "fix", "cheat", "we was robbed!", "string him up". Fights break out in the audience and we hear police sirens in the distance. Fade to black.]
You are now free to post your alternative haikus whilst we all await the outcome of the Fraud Squad investigation.
|
|
|
Montgomery "F**k!"
|
Posted - 04/18/2007 : 16:13:05
|
Alt. Haiku:
Only time Tom Hanks was jealous of Tim Allen. Ooh, mean, but still true.
EM :) |
|
|
Montgomery "F**k!"
|
Posted - 04/18/2007 : 16:13:58
|
Congrats Whipper. Find another fun film we can tribute in 17 syllables.
EM :) |
|
|
Beanmimo "August review site"
|
Posted - 04/18/2007 : 17:01:51
|
well done with the badgering of the votes!!
|
|
|
Topic |
|
|
|